Space; it’s a lonely place

I remember seeing the Macmillan ‘Not Alone’ advert when it first came out a few years back and it struck a chord with me then, but has done even more so now. On finding out the news about my mam’s alien visitor, it felt like this huge sonic boom came out of nowhere and hit every one of our family and close friends; sending our little lives into outer-space; a dark place where no Harper had been before.

The hit was hard – it knocked us, off our feet and hurtling through the air, but we have not yet crash landed on the ground. This is because of the incredibly humbling, yet earth-shattering love and support from our friends that has held us in a safety net they were unbelievably quick at making. From the Harpers – thank you!

From the woman who gave me gin and wished to take the pain away, to the man who holds me when I cry whilst putting the washing away or have nightmares, the Sheffield gal who continues to text me, my uni friends who turn up on my doorstep, given me happiness by telling me first that they are pregnant or just reminding me that I and my family are loved,  the friends I may have lost touch with who make contact so I know they are still very much there, to my colleagues who tell me ‘that can wait’ or ‘we can cover this’ or just stop everything to listen; punctuating my day with hugs or being generous enough to give me £100 worth of train vouchers so I don’t have to worry about getting to the Mothership…

Also thank you to the St Johns Ambulance Technicians who listened to my mam and fought her corner and to the staff at Freemans Hospital who continue to see Lorraine and everything that she is – it is hard not being physically next to her every step of the way, but knowing that she is in your care does take the edge off somewhat.

I cannot thank you enough. In the most unluckiest of circumstances you make us feel very lucky.

An alien attack can make the world feel like a very lonely place; what used to be your everyday, suddenly is just out of arms reach – almost at your fingertips, but never quite in your grasp.  I have never felt so lonely in all my life. A loneliness like no other, that does not go away or can be conquered by rational…but with everybody taking their part of the net, I feel held and that is doing so much – more than I can ever explain or will ever be able to fully repay.


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